Hi Everyone! How are you? I am fine.
Fizzy drinks might be my single most favourite thing in this world, or any other world for that matter. Not only are they a very fertile area for novelty, they are a great way of getting incredibly unhealthy amounts of sugar directly into your body and fast!
But what if you could do that in a way that
made you drunk too? Would that be a good idea? There’s only one way to find
out!
Taste
First off, a disclaimer, I put some rum in this.
To be fair, it’s marketed as a mixer, and so I mixed that mother. The remaining
paragraphs of this post may be somewhat tainted by that fact.
As I say, that’s
a disclaimer rather than an apology because firstly, I only did what I was told
to do by the label and secondly, I don’t respect you enough to ever apologise
for anything.
 |
| Just a bottle? Or a cynical, contrived piece of evil marketing genius? You decide! |
I did have a quick sip before slipping the rum
in and I can only really say that it was as expected. Like coke, only smokier. I
know that’s not as incisive as you may have wanted, but there it is.
I really liked this, especially with the rum. Unlike
standard coke, this was less a simple exercise of adding sugar to a drink that’s
a bit too grown up for you, and more a case of adding sugar, and a bit of
complimentary taste. I have no idea what the flavours listed on the bottle actually
are (Ylang Ylang? Ambrette? Guaiacwood?), but I can only assume they’re either nice
or completely made up. Either way, they go with rum.
Texture
Have you drunk coke before? Well if you have,
imagine that texture.
If you haven’t, imagine lemonade.
I can’t add to this, it was like coke, and coke
is popular for a reason, so you do the math(s).
Packaging
It’s in a clever little bottle with a clever
little piece of paper over the lid for no reason other than to make it look
clever. It’s so up itself with its fancy label all signed by ‘Master Mixologist’
Max Venning (who?), and pretending it’s part of a ‘batch’.
It’s been designed within an inch of its life to
appeal to the hipster market. It’s cynical in a way that is almost contemptuous
the people it’s trying to target.
It’s a hugely contrived piece of corporate
branding, clearly thought up by evil geniuses intent on making us buy things that are bad for us that we don't even want, and I love it so much.
At least they’ve made an effort.
 |
| #fancy |
Marketing
Some, not a lot. Have you ever heard of this
stuff? Says it all really doesn’t it?
I found some trade magazine articles, a few press
releases and one or two staged photos, but nothing much else.
But then, if they’re going for the hipster market maybe that’s the point? Hipsters hate liking things that everyone else likes, in fact well all do. Maybe best way to get us all drinking this is to not tell anyone about it.
Sneaky!
Or maybe I’m overthinking it. I can’t score this
highly because there’s no adverts, and that’s the whole point, but I’m giving
them a couple of bonus points because I can only assume the Coca Cola group are
better at marketing than me.
Novelty Factor
Huge! It’s Coke! But it’s not Coke! It’s special
Coke, that you have to be special to drink, and has to be drunk in a special
way with other special things added in. #special
I’ve never seen anything like this before, even
if it wasn’t coca cola, it’d be novelty, but the brand just adds to it. I was
super excited to see this, and I’m still super excited now.
Final Scores
Taste- 8.5/10
Texture- 8/10
Packaging- 9/10
Marketing- 2/10
Novelty Factor- 9.5/10
Overall- 37/50
Really great score, just failing to take the
lead as the new king of novelty food. Number one is still Jonny Wilkinson’s
drink (https://noveltyfoodbyj.blogspot.com/2019/06/no-1-living-cola-kombucha-so-novelty.html)
and if this had even bothered with one
advert it would have been the new leader.
Was it a good idea? Clearly the employment policy of coca cola is working, because it's another great product from those evil bastards! #allhailcocacola
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